piroeoe:

riben:

2002slut:

childhoodrecalled:

these bitches only existed on hallmark cards

They exist in my head and talk to each other while I drive to the.Store

negativebills:

tsunamiwavesurfing:

ocelotrevs:

tsunamiwavesurfing:

i stepped in my kitchen late last night and I ain’t had a single snack in the cribo. went back to bed mad disgruntled. felt like oliver twist. like a pre industrial revolution british kid or something

This is why I decided to learn how to bake.

brother i said i missed the bus and you telling me this is why you became an astronaut. where do we go from here?

jame7t:

cryptotheism:

jame7t:

man if I saw an elf nobody would be able to stop me

From what

nobody would be able to stop me

:

Uhm, Actually, tenderness ruins what wrath perfects 🙄

play-now-my-lord:

sygol:

oh youre a nasty computer girl, when im through with you, youre gonna need your a full factory reset on your BIOS. open up your firewall, sysadmin is about to install 1001 free cursors/emoticons from a banner ad

normies flirting with a computer girl: ouhhh wires… cards… da eroticism of da machine…
geniuses flirting with a computer girl: Open your mouth for BonziBuddy you nasty bitch

disgustinggf:

talkshowhost1996:

catchymemes: